when i got the letter, i knew i was ready for it. i knew i was going to finish it no matter what. then when we got together and as it was getting closer, my heart sank deeper and deeper as each day passed by. it struck me that i didn't wanna go anymore. i wished it wasn't me instead. i wanted an escape. i needed an escape. the day had finally arrived and he wasn't there. i wished he was there. as i held back my tears in the bus, i missed him badly. he came over on the third day. i wasn't expecting him but was glad to see him standing there looking back at me. i hugged him and cried. he tried to calm me down. it was only the third day. he told me he couldn't come on Sunday. my heart sank so deep till i couldn't see it again. he made a promise to me; that he would come and visit me as often as he could. this was all he could do and this was the only thing he could do. there were no options left for us. i made it a must to call him every night without failing. i made new friends and i had fun. i cried and i laughed. but it didn't stop me from missing him. those 3 months of NS really taught me a lot.
that was something which i didn't post out. neither in my friendster's blog. something which i kept in me something which gave me a clear vision every time i think about it. the pain and the feeling. it is still very clear to me now.